A friend asked me recently how I was doing with “the big JC?” I replied that I didn’t think he was very big at the moment!

He went on to ask me whether I still considered myself a Christian. My answer was that it depended how you defined what a Christian is.

If you’re definition is that a Christian is someone who has a relationship with God, or Jesus, then yes, I think I would say I was still a Christian. I do think that I have a relationship with Jesus, though it is very fractured and strained right now. But the fact that “it” feels fractured and strained means that there is something there.

Am I living in the Spirit and only doing what I see the Father doing? No. But my thinking and actions are still shaped bythe values I have adopted as a result of my Christian upbringing and own faith journey over the years.

I do want to have a better relationship with Jesus one day, and sometimes I feel paniced when I don’t feel it progressing. But most times I don’t feel in any hurry.